Holidays and Grief

Honoring Life, Legacy, and Love at Christmas

What It Means to Be a Certified Funeral Service Practitioner (CFSP)

Top 5 Questions to Ask When Planning a Funeral

Respecting your wishes

Let’s talk about something delicate, yet necessary. It happens more than we care to admit: the casket opens, and out comes a phone. A flash. A snap. A quick photo. A post. A caption. And just like that, what should be a sacred moment becomes content. Taking pictures of the deceased is not just poor etiquette—it’s trauma in disguise. “I just wanted one last photo…” I get it. You’re grieving. You want to remember. You might even feel like it’s your way of saying goodbye. But let me say this gently: what brings you closure could bring someone else unimaginable pain. Funeral services are not photoshoots. The deceased is not a spectacle. And someone’s mother, father, child, or friend does not deserve to be remembered in death through the lens of your phone. Here’s What the Family Sees: A violation of sacred space A lack of consent A moment of vulnerability turned into exposure A complete disregard for dignity and rest Imagine watching someone you love finally laid to rest—only to find their image, lips sealed by death, floating across social media platforms like a trending topic. It hurts. It dishonors. It often enrages. Reminder: If you didn’t ask the family’s permission, you have no business clicking that camera. Legacy Deserves Reverence Let us not confuse remembrance with recording. You can honor someone’s life by telling stories, sharing their smile, living out their lessons. You don’t need to document their final stillness to prove your love. If you truly want a keepsake, ask the family if there are pre-approved memorial images or programs available. Many families now design tribute videos, photo boards, or digital slideshows for this reason—with dignity and intention. There is nothing glamorous about grief. There is nothing respectful about uninvited photography. And there is nothing more sacred than the space between someone’s final breath and their final farewell. Let the dead rest. Let the family mourn. And let your phone stay in your purse, pocket or car. Because **honoring the deceased isn’t about what you capture—it’s about what you carry forward.

Let’s have a heart-to-heart. A funeral is not just a service—it’s sacred space. It’s where legacy is honored, grief is witnessed, and dignity is demanded. Yet too often, I’ve seen people show up to homegoings like it’s brunch, a block party, or worse… a photo shoot. Funeral etiquette still matters, and as the curator of grace and good sense, Funeral Barbie is here to lovingly remind you of a few non-negotiables. Arrive Early. Period. Let’s be clear: showing up late to a funeral is not just disrespectful—it’s disruptive. You interrupt mourning families, block views, and sometimes walk in during the most sacred moments. Don’t do it. Tip: Use Google Maps, Waze, or Apple Maps to plan your trip. Check traffic the night before. And if you’re prone to running late, aim to arrive 30 minutes early and wait in your car. Punctuality at funerals is a sign of respect—not just for the deceased, but for those carrying their memory. Dress Like You Understand the Assignment No, black isn’t always required—but dignity is. That means no crop tops, no leggings-as-pants, no bedazzled club heels, and definitely no slogan tees. You are there to honor a life, not make a fashion statement. Dress Code Basics: Black, navy, charcoal, or muted colors Dresses or skirts to the knee or longer Suits, slacks, and modest tops for men Shoulders and cleavage covered, if possible Comfortable shoes (especially for graveside services) When in doubt, elevated and understated wins every time. Put the Phone Away—And I Mean AWAY Let me say this with love: the funeral is not your content. Unless you’re the official photographer (and trust me, they rarely are), you have no business recording, livestreaming, or snapping selfies during the service. Put your phone on silent. Leave it in your purse or pocket. This is not the time for distractions. If you must use your phone (for navigation or emergencies), step outside. Never scroll during a eulogy. Never film a casket. Never post a grieving family without consent. There’s a fine line between remembrance and disrespect—and cell phones often cross it. Use Online Tools to Stay Informed & Organized Many families now use websites or apps to share funeral details, RSVP links, virtual streaming options, and even donation links. Don’t ignore these resources. Check the obituary website, church announcement page, or funeral home portal before asking the family for details. It saves them emotional labor—and keeps you informed about parking, attire requests, or live stream info. A little digital awareness goes a long way in honoring the process without adding stress. Funerals are moments of deep reverence—not a time to perform, distract, or draw attention to yourself. Whether you knew the person well or you’re just showing support, the rule is simple: show up with love, dress with care, and move with quiet respect. Because in our culture, how you show up when someone’s gone says everything about who you are while they’re here.

Let’s talk real. Planning your final arrangements isn’t taboo—it’s responsible. But purchasing your own casket or urn without proper knowledge can be a costly, emotional, and sometimes irreversible mistake. I see it happen too often: people walking into funeral homes or online shops thinking they’re taking control of their exit, but they’re doing it blind. They don’t know the materials, the laws, the hidden fees, or how their choices might burden their families later. Let’s pull back the satin curtain and talk facts: Not All Caskets Are Created Equal That $5,000 casket might look luxurious online—but is it solid wood or wood veneer? Is it sealed or non-sealed? Does it meet the cemetery’s burial vault requirements? Many people buy based on appearance without understanding durability, environmental regulations, or what’s actually needed for burial. Tip: Always ask for a l Price List from any provider be sure it breaks down every item and fee. Urn Shopping is More Than Pretty Patterns Urns aren’t just decorative—they serve specific purposes. Is the urn meant for burial, scattering, or display? Does it need to meet TSA guidelines for air travel? What’s the size in cubic inches? If the math is wrong, your loved one’s ashes may not even fit. Tip: One pound of body weight equals roughly one cubic inch of ash. Plan accordingly. You Might Be Double Paying If you purchase a casket or urn ahead of time without coordinating with your chosen funeral home, you risk paying again—either in storage fees, or delivery issues. Know Your Rights: Under the FTC Funeral Rule, funeral homes must accept caskets and urns purchased elsewhere. They can’t charge you a fee just for bringing your own. You’re Planning Emotionally, Not Logically Let’s be honest. Sometimes we choose the most extravagant option because we think it’s “what we deserve.” But extravagance doesn’t equal peace of mind. Your farewell should reflect your values, not your vulnerability. Ask yourself: Am I choosing this to make a statement, or to lighten the load on my loved ones? Planning your own homegoing isn’t morbid—it’s sacred. But don’t let luxury, fear, or misinformation lead your decisions. Do the research, ask the questions, and remember: legacy isn’t in the lining of the casket—it’s in the clarity you leave behind. You deserve a farewell that honors you without burdening the people you love.

Funeral planning is a difficult task, and it’s something that many people prefer to avoid thinking about until absolutely necessary. However, one of the best ways to ensure that your final wishes are respected while also alleviating the burden on your loved ones is to pre-plan your funeral. Pre-planning gives you the opportunity to make decisions that reflect your personal desires, while providing peace of mind for both you and your family. In this blog post, we’ll explore the many benefits of pre-planning your funeral and how it can make a challenging time easier for everyone involved. 1. Reducing the Burden on Loved Ones When a loved one passes away, the emotional strain can be overwhelming. Having to make funeral arrangements while grieving can add an extra layer of stress for family members. By pre-planning your funeral, you take on the responsibility of making these decisions, which means your loved ones can focus on grieving and celebrating your life rather than worrying about logistics. Pre-planning can help them avoid making difficult decisions during a time when they are emotionally vulnerable. 2. Ensuring Your Wishes Are Honored One of the main reasons to pre-plan a funeral is to ensure that your final wishes are clearly communicated and followed. This includes decisions about the type of service, burial or cremation preferences, and any specific requests, such as music, readings, or specific ceremonial elements. By documenting your wishes in advance, you can relieve your family from the uncertainty of making decisions on your behalf, ensuring that the funeral aligns with your values and desires. 3. Financial Benefits and Cost Control Funerals can be expensive, with costs adding up quickly for services, caskets, and other memorial items. By pre-planning your funeral, you can lock in today’s prices and avoid potential future price increases. Many funeral homes offer pre-payment options that allow you to pay for the funeral over time, providing financial security for your family and reducing their financial burden. It’s important to discuss the details with the funeral home to understand exactly what is included in your pre-paid plan. 4. Personalizing the Service Pre-planning gives you the opportunity to personalize the funeral service to reflect your unique personality and life. You can choose specific songs, readings, and speakers that are meaningful to you, ensuring that the service is a true reflection of your values and preferences. This can make the event more memorable for your family and friends, and provide them with a meaningful way to celebrate your life. 5. Avoiding Family Disagreements Funeral planning can sometimes lead to disagreements among family members, especially if there are differing opinions about how to honor the deceased. By pre-planning your funeral, you make your wishes clear, which can help avoid potential conflicts among family members. This is particularly important if there are complex family dynamics that could lead to stress or tension during an already emotional time. At G Choice Funeral Chapel, we understand that pre-planning your funeral is a deeply personal and important decision. Our experienced team is here to guide you through the process with compassion and professionalism, ensuring that your final wishes are met while easing the burden on your loved ones. If you’re interested in learning more about pre-planning your funeral, or if you have questions about the options available, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with us . We are here to help you make informed decisions and provide peace of mind for you and your family. Contact G Choice Funeral Chapel today to get started.

Grief is a deeply personal experience that everyone faces at some point in life. It can be triggered by the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or any other significant loss. What many people don’t realize is that grief doesn’t follow a single, predictable path. It can be a complicated mix of emotions and experiences, and it can vary from person to person. Understanding the stages of grief and how to cope with them can provide comfort and guidance during a very challenging time. In this blog post, we’ll explore the stages of grief and offer some strategies for coping with the pain and loss. The Stages of Grief: The concept of the stages of grief was first introduced by psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross in her groundbreaking 1969 book On Death and Dying. According to Kübler-Ross, there are five primary stages of grief that many people go through when facing loss. These stages, though not necessarily experienced in order or at all, can provide a helpful framework for understanding the emotional turmoil that comes with grief. Denial The first stage of grief is often denial. This is when individuals have difficulty accepting the reality of their loss. They may feel numb or as if the situation isn’t real. Denial can provide a temporary defense mechanism, allowing people to slowly process the shock of their loss. Anger As reality begins to set in, anger may follow. People in this stage often feel frustration and resentment, either toward themselves, others, or even the deceased. This anger can stem from feelings of helplessness, and it may manifest in outward irritability or inward self-blame. Bargaining During this stage, individuals may try to make deals or promises in an attempt to reverse the loss. They might find themselves thinking, “If only I had done this differently,” or “I’ll change if you bring them back.” Bargaining is often an expression of regret and a desire to regain some control over the situation. Depression As the full reality of the loss sinks in, individuals may experience sadness and despair. Feelings of hopelessness, isolation, and overwhelming sorrow are common in this stage. It’s important to recognize that depression is a natural part of the grieving process, but it can also be a signal to seek support. Acceptance The final stage of grief is acceptance, where individuals come to terms with their loss. While this does not mean the pain is gone, it indicates that the person has begun to adjust to life without their loved one and has found a way to move forward. This stage often brings a sense of peace, though it can take time. Coping with Grief: Understanding that grief is a complex and ongoing process is crucial for coping with loss. Here are some strategies that may help individuals manage their grief: Allow Yourself to Feel It’s important to let yourself experience the full range of emotions that come with grief. Suppressing feelings may only prolong the healing process. Give yourself permission to grieve and process emotions without judgment. Talk to Someone Sharing your feelings with friends, family, or a therapist can be incredibly healing. Talking about your loss can help you process your emotions and feel less isolated. Practice Self-Care Taking care of your physical health can support your emotional healing. Make sure to get enough rest, eat well, and engage in activities that help reduce stress, such as yoga, meditation, or taking walks. Seek Support Groups Grief support groups can provide a sense of community with others who are going through similar experiences. These groups can offer comfort and validation and help you feel less alone. If you’re struggling with grief and need support, G Choice Funeral Chapel is here to help. We offer grief support resources and can connect you with local support groups or professional counselors to guide you through this difficult time. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us for assistance or simply to talk. Our compassionate team is here to provide the support and comfort you need to navigate your grief and begin healing. Contact G Choice Funeral Chapel today for more information.